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About Me

El Paso, Texas, United States
Watershed Moments: Grew up in Alaska, Seattle Wash and high school years in Las Cruces NM nestled below the Organ Mountains. Married at 20 Motherhood at 21, BA at 24 Widowed at 27. Explosive encounter with Christ at 30, remarried at 37 to a very handsome Dutch missionary. Worked with indigenous peoples for 7 years. Went to seminary at 42 and applied for Ph.D at Trinity in 2009. Widowed at 63.

Friday, November 4, 2011

Mary Oh Mary!

A dark and yet divine fire devours me. For what end? Consider Mary Magdalen, "in spite of her past, paid no heed to the crowds, prominent as well as unknown, at the banquet. She did not consider the propriety of weeping and shedding tears in the presence of our Lord's guests. Her only concern
was to reach him for whom her soul was already wounded and on fire, without delay and without waiting for another more appropriate time (Luke 7:37-38).

And such is the inebriation and courage of love; knowing that her beloved was shut up in the tomb by a huge sealed rock and surrounded by guards so the disciples could not steal his body, she did not permit this to keep her from going out with ointments before daybreak to anoint Him (Mt. 27:64-66; Mk 16;1-2;
Jn 20:1).

Finally this inebriation and urgent longing of love prompted her to ask the man she thought was the gardener if he had stolen him and, if he had, to tell her where he had put him, so that she could take him away (Jn 20:15). She did not stop to realize that her question in the light of sound judgment was foolish, for obviously if he had stolen the Lord he would not have told her, and still less would he have allowed her to take him away.

The strength and vehemence of love has this trait: everything seems possible to it, and it believes everyone is occupied as it is; it does not believe anyone could possible be employed in any other way or seek anyone than him whom it seeks and loves...

And so the wounded soul so vexed rises up at night, and anxiously and forcibly goes out in search of its God. Since it is immersed in darkness it feels his absence and feels that it is dying without love of him."

And so my soul is purged of all remaining fears— of man, of the future, of self... so driven I am by my own darkness. . . that I die lest I find Him. Attach to Him and not to be my beloved earthly bridegroom. And hence my soul will be renewed and will be clothed anew, shed of its old skin.

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